Blog Me Harder Than You've Ever Blogged Me Before!
1. Wow. Swiss people sure are...Swiss. Went to the park in Martigny with Devyn yesterday, saw about 30 different rainbow shades of purple hair. On women. They were not punk rockers. I even saw a 70 year old granny with pink hair. I think the box of haircolor they buy actually says: "Fucked-Up Purple Swiss Hair # 202"
2. Practiced with Dave and Arco last night, for our big concert Saturday night. Holy Jesus's underwear, if we pull this off, I will eat my bra. Keep in mind I couldn't get a hang of the drums 'cause my right foot is permanently paralyzed on the upward stroke, so Dave had me playing drums ON A KEYBOARD. He said I looked like a handicapped retard banging on a piano. Nice. We are also singing the Police's 'Every Breath You Take' with a Spanish accent. Gypsy Kings style. Somewhere in England, Sting is having a heart attack.
3. Had two different kinds of cheese fondue last week, yummy, but David suffered the next day. All he needed was to eat some nuts, and his bowel movement could have looked like a Christmas cheese log.
4. Couldn't sleep last night, tried to watch T.V., unfortunately 80% of the programming was soft porn. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but watching it solo is a little disturbing. I can't be screaming obscenities at the screen, for Pete's sake!...and Nonna was upstairs in bed. Very low on the sexiness scale.
5. Speaking of Nonna, came downstairs this morning and walked in on her in the bathroom stark naked. Holy Mother of God. The blindness is finally starting to recede, I'm slowly seeing blurry shapes in the corners of my sight line. Unfortunately, the image will forever be burned in my mind...
Please God, remind me to wear my bra everyday, so that my breasts don't pool at my waist. And God, make it so I don't ever run out of razors for my legs and privates.
Amen.
Peace Out MoFo's.
2. Practiced with Dave and Arco last night, for our big concert Saturday night. Holy Jesus's underwear, if we pull this off, I will eat my bra. Keep in mind I couldn't get a hang of the drums 'cause my right foot is permanently paralyzed on the upward stroke, so Dave had me playing drums ON A KEYBOARD. He said I looked like a handicapped retard banging on a piano. Nice. We are also singing the Police's 'Every Breath You Take' with a Spanish accent. Gypsy Kings style. Somewhere in England, Sting is having a heart attack.
3. Had two different kinds of cheese fondue last week, yummy, but David suffered the next day. All he needed was to eat some nuts, and his bowel movement could have looked like a Christmas cheese log.
4. Couldn't sleep last night, tried to watch T.V., unfortunately 80% of the programming was soft porn. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but watching it solo is a little disturbing. I can't be screaming obscenities at the screen, for Pete's sake!...and Nonna was upstairs in bed. Very low on the sexiness scale.
5. Speaking of Nonna, came downstairs this morning and walked in on her in the bathroom stark naked. Holy Mother of God. The blindness is finally starting to recede, I'm slowly seeing blurry shapes in the corners of my sight line. Unfortunately, the image will forever be burned in my mind...
Please God, remind me to wear my bra everyday, so that my breasts don't pool at my waist. And God, make it so I don't ever run out of razors for my legs and privates.
Amen.
Peace Out MoFo's.
posted by Lara at 1:57 AM
2 Comments:
Si, ed anche "o sole mio" !!!
anytime I see my grams is tramatic...
I just came from NM and saw mine and was told that I should learn from how well she takes care of her body...Her boobs in the longline bra could probably save her in a 50 mph car crash! Couffed Aqua net hair that hasn't moved since 78...I was told that I looked dumpy and reminded to wear high heels, an inch for every 5# overweight...I'd take grandma natural!!
Post a Comment
<< Home