What the fuck. No seriously, what the fuck.
Sarah Palin is really the best representative the Republican party could find? Really? Well then, I guess we're fucked.
I just saw a bit on the evening news about a group of women here in Arizona who are absolutely pleased with Mrs. Palin and her outlook and beliefs. They urged all Hillary Clinton supporters to "come on over". Why, you ask? Because, just like Clinton, Sarah Palin is a WOMAN. Yes, a woman. Because there are so few of those left in this world, we really should support one that's running for Vice President. All women in the United States should vote for Palin because she has a pussy. No hidden salami here! Just good ole' hairy clam, poontang, va-jay-jay, etc.
Why would you want to base your vote on a candidate's beliefs, platform, ideas, when you could rely purely on their sex?
If this is true, then I guess all American men who are old/white/rich/cheated on their first wife with a much younger model/pro-life/anti-gay, will vote for John McCain. But only because he is a man. And at the same time, all American men who are young/black/fairly rich/solid marriage/pro-choice/pro-gay, will vote for Obama. But once again, only because he's a man.
The Mexicans and Asians are fucked. They'll have to sit this election out because they don't have anyone who represents their sex or race. Lucky bastards.
What pisses me off to no end, is that if the Democrats and Obama had chosen Hillary Clinton as a running mate, they would have been criticized and ridiculed for choosing firstly a woman and secondly, a damn tough bitch. The Republicans would have pointed out that just because Hillary is a woman, she didn't deserve the American female vote, but instead, all parties should be judged on their performance and experience.
Now that the Republicans have a woman on their ballot, those reasons are thrown out the window. Did you hear that speech? "I am just a regular hockey mom." "What's the difference between a hockey mom and a pitbull? A hockey mom wears lipstick." Wow Palin, you must crack yourself up a lot.
Yeah, because that's exactly who I want running this country when that zombied corpse McCain finally kicks the bucket after his first year in office. A fucking hockey mom. You think I should identify with you because you are a woman, you have 5 kids whom you love and drive to school everyday?
First of all, put the dick down. Do they not have fucking television in Alaska? Are you fucking to stay warm? Are you a sex addict? And what the fuck were you smoking when you named your kids? Piper, Willow, Bristol, Trig and Track. Where's Field? Cross Country? How about Snap, Crackle and Pop? You fucking retard.
Then it gets really good. I start reading about you and realize:
1. You're a hunter. You love to kill you some bear, deer and shiz. You have a full bear skin laying on the couch in your Alaskan office. You went moose hunting with your dad as a young kid.
2. You and your husband believe Alaska should not be part of the United States, but a country of its own.
3. You finished second in the Miss Alaska pageant and your talent was playing flute. (One time, at band camp...)
4. You admit to smoking marijuana but say you did not enjoy it. (Your children's names are fucked up, and you have a Down's baby. I think you enjoyed it plenty)
5. You believe in banning books you don't agree with from libraries.
6. You promoted oil and natural gas development in Alaska, including drilling in the Alaskan National Wildlife Refuge.
7. You supported a policy allowing state biologists to hunt down and shoot wolves from helicopters to increase the moose population, so that hunters like you would have more moose to hunt.
8. You believe polar bears should be hunted and not placed on the endangered species list.
9. You describe yourself "as pro-life as pro-life can be." (You refused an early abortion even after it became clear your youngest son had Down's Syndrome).
10. Your favorite activities are hunting, ice-fishing and riding snowmobiles.( And readjusting that big cock you got between your legs.)
11. When asked about Iraq, you said "there is a plan, and that plan is God's plan." (what the fuck does God have to do with Iraq???)
12. You believe that terrorism against Israel is due to the disbelief in Jesus by the Jewish population. (just for this, you should be spanked with barbed wire)
So let me get this straight. Because I am a woman, I should vote for:
an animal killer
a confederate hillbilly
a failed beauty queen
a pot head
a Hitler fan
a polluter
an ignorant selfish idiot
a white trash tomboy
and a racist bible-thumper?
WHERE DO I SIGN UP??????
Just because you happen to have tits and a vagina like me does not mean you will get my vote, support or even remotely, my sympathy. I can't even feel bad for you that your son's life will be miserable with his disease, and that your poor daughter will have to raise a child most likely without a spouse, and with a complete asshole as a mother. Sarah Palin getting nominated for VP is the most demeaning thing to happen to women since bukkake videos.
Shit. Now I'm totally pissed off about something I can't change because I never bothered to get citizenship and can't vote. GOD BLESS THE USA!!!
